A seemingly impossible departure looms upon my daily experience of Life.

I have fallen in Love before. One could almost say that falling in Love is a major part of who I am. Yet this time around, the Love I have come to found is hard to leave. I seem to have become attached to being surrounded by the subject of my Love...

Mongolia.

Arriving seemed like an impossibility. A bit like the upcoming departure.
I did not believe I was actually going to arrive until the plane touched down. I could hardly understand where I had landed until the jet-lag wore off, some 4 days after my arrival. I could barely contain the disbelief as I sat around the small dung campfire while my hosts sang old songs under a starry night sky. What else would I need to achieve during this Lifetime? What greater achievement could there be to reach than to penetrate this land like I have had the fortune to? What greater sense to Life than to meet the people I have met and become close friends with over the past four weeks?

I have kept a relatively tight journal since my arrival. I have also noticed that I have started recovering my memory, which is a pleasant feeling - sort of like becoming human again. I have seen myself much clearer than before, I have opened my eyes to loopholes I get sucked into, and emotional patterns I seem to get stuck into when travelling.

Yet this travel has been much more than any other ever has before.
I have changed my mind, my opinions about a wide range of issues. I have experienced a different sense of myself as well as Others. I have learned about close friendship, about Love as felt between humans who share a greater belief in ordinary events than the regular Joe on the street.

And now I have to learn to leave, like never before.
This country has become a home my mind refuses to imagine as anything else than my permanent residence. These people have become dearer to me than any other. This language a key that I wish to take a hold of and master as soon as possible.

I sway with the Love that beats within my body for this land.
I sway with the Love I have found for its people.

How am I going to leave?
What will my Heart do? - will it follow me or choose to remain here?